Monday, December 31, 2012

Pinterest addict

I've become extremely addicted to Pinterest. I'm always finding such neat things. Josh gets out of the Navy in the fall, so I can't help but get excited for the things I can do in my own home. Military housing is the pits. The off white flat paint walls are awful and no matter what I do it just never feels like home. I have this long list of things I want my husband to do or build lol. He hates me. I'm just excited to have a place of our own and Pinterest is giving me tons of ideas. Super exciting!!

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Military and Friendships

Being a military spouse can be hard. We move where the military tells us, we set down temporary roots, make friends and then before we know it, it's time to move again. So that means we make friends, then leave those friends and hope to find new ones at the next duty station. Sometimes that happens and sometimes it doesn't. For me it's not the thought of making new friends that I fear, it's losing the ones I have when I move. I've always found friends at every duty station. Some better then past friend and some worse. But it's the past friendships that fizzle out that hurt the most. How can we be best friends or maybe not even best but really good friends and then when one moves the friendship just seems to die? I always seem to be the better friend in all of my friendships. I'm by no means tooting my own horn or trying to say I'm perfect b/c I'm far from that. But, I always seem to be the one that tries harder to keep this long distance friendship alive. I seem to be the needy one or the emotional one when my feelings get hurt b/c it's apparent they don't think of me like I still do of them. It just sucks.

You put all this time and energy into people, build memories with them and then just like that you are a distant memory. If it weren't for Facebook these "friends" wouldn't know a thing about your life. And that same for you. You wouldn't know a damn thing about their lives either. But you put on your big girl panties and move on. But as a mother with children this is where you can't just move on. The children build relationships with these people and their children too. So when these friendships don't last after a new duty station, it's the kids that ask questions and have hurt feelings too. Because our kids loose friends too. I think all the way around, this is one of my cons for being a military wife. I'm by no means a small town girl but I long for the day when my husband is out of the military and we settle down somewhere. Somewhere that we can actually lay down roots. Some place where we can have friends that don't move and can actually test the fate of a true friendship. Now don't get me wrong, I've made some great friends following my husband around the country. But the sad fact is, I have more failed friendships then true ones. As I get older I find myself staying to myself. I've become introverted and not really a people person anymore. I'm more resistant to make new friends. It's just the way I like it.

Okay, I'll end my vent or rant or thought for now. Friendships have been weighing heavy on my mind recently.